Pre-Season Panic (the other PSP)

Ahh if there was one thing that was going to get me back posting it was a match. Let's be entirely frank the day to day goings on in the world of football are interesting but nothing causes the venom to spew from my fingertips like four quarters of hot AFL action.

Usually pre-season matches go right over my head. Even a few years back when we had a habit of going out there full of confidence and coming back a hundred points worse off it didn't make much of an impact. And to be honest I'm not actually that affected by tonight's game but there are two matters that desperately need to be cleared up before we can possibly go any further;

a) Adem Yze should give back every cent of his match fee for tonight. If you're not interested in going out there and doing what you're paid to do then piss off home and spend your Sunday night watching CSI: Las Vegas or something. The fact that he will probably one day hold the record for the most games for our club despite having gone along at 25% for the last two years is criminal.

b) Brad Miller will never EVER be the CHF or FF of an AFL team. I don't give two shits how many marks he took against Fremantle in the finals last year (especially as they were all on the wing) he has absolutely no idea what he's doing out there.

I feel that you'll be hearing a lot more on issues (a) and (b) throughout the season. Especially after last year's pre-season campaigns against Pickett and Green spurred them on to decent seasons. FACT.

As for the rest of tonight I wouldn't take it so seriously if it wasn't for two of our alleged senior players being completely shit. We were without McLean, Davey, Whelan, Moloney, Johnstone and god knows who else (Holland? Philthy?) against a pretty much full strength side who have had about 720 top ten picks in the draft in the last two years and are looking like a half decent team this year. Therefore conventional wisdom says a four goal loss means nothing. I do, however, question the intensity shown in the last quarter - it's one thing to lose but another to roll over and die like a mangy dog in the streets.

There were positives. Chris Johnson was excellent, and both Buckley and Frawley looked handy in their first real hitouts in senior company. Of the senior players Bruce, McDonald and Brown were good and Jamar did some nice work in the centre. Yet again Daniel Ward (with surprisingly little "ZOMG U BET ON SOMETHING! LOL! LOL!" from the crowd) wandered around for four quarters like he had leprosy and occasionally did the sort of good looking things that it's easy to do when you haven't gone near a direct opponent since Rd 13, 2001.

On other matters we have an addition to the "I hate Telstra Dome" file. The honeymoon period I had from practically living next door to the place for two years and being able to walk in my front door before the winners song had been played twice is OVER and I'm back on the "burn the m'fing place down" bandwagon. They now have a "no pass out" policy - which basically means that once you walk in the door you're trapped.

Why would you do this? It wouldn't have anything at all to do with the fact that there's a Nandos/Subway/Souvalki/Pizza shop lineup right outside the gates and that thousands of people flock out there at half time for food rather than paying the overinflated and frankly ludicrous prices for what they sell inside the ground. This is the most cynical move of recent times and people should be up in arms against it - don't believe any of the shit they tell you about it involving smoking or people kicking the footy outside. It's 100% bullshit. The Corporate Dome and it's caterers are bending you over and giving you what for so they can make a few extra dollars. Disgraceful - I'd willingly never set foot in that place again.

Anyway - now for the "these mean nothing but let's give 'em anyway" Todd McHardy Pre-Season Player of the Year competition votes.

5 - Chris Johnson
4 - James McDonald
3 - Cameron Bruce
2 - Nathan Brown
1 - Mark Jamar

Positives: More players to come back. Roll on Rd. 1 - as much as football frustrates the fuck out of me I miss it when it's away.

Negatives: The combined effect on my body of two nights of heroic alcohol consumption, the tension of a football match, 36 minutes of indoor soccer death and the prospect of having 72.5 million things to do at work. Nurse, hand me the needle.

Next week: Essendon Adelaide in Mt. Gambier. I sure as hell won't be there but if you will feel free to send a report to supermercado AT DEMONBLOG dot com and/or seek psychological treatment.