Sunday, 16 April 2006

I Can Hear The Grass Grow

Well, that was interesting. By now you will presumably know that we lost to the Crows by five points at Cararra today. If you didn't already know why are you relying on me to tell you for? I don't know anything. In fact there must be something wrong with me because this afternoon we were quite clearly jibbed out of at least a draw by a contentious goal umpiring decision and I'm not outraged. I live right next door to AFL House and you'd expect that in these circumstances there'd be a repeat of the game where Fitzroy got robbed against Adelaide and their fans spraypainted the place with slogans but I'm just not that concerned.

Perhaps it's because the difference between us having a good season and a shite season will almost certainly be more than two points. I like to think it's because of general apathy with the ugly way we play, and the obvious lack of any decent gameplan but I won't pretend I wasn't flipping out in the last quarter when the comeback was on. The most laughable part of the whole scandal is the fact that everyone has leapt on the fact that she's a woman as if a male umpire could never possibly make the wrong decision. Who are those guys in white that you spend four quarters abusing every week you morons?

A full recap will not be forthcoming as although I was watching the game I wasn't taking any particularly close notice of what was going on. Besides that it's impossible to form your own clear opinion on a match when you're being brainwashed by the three stooges in the commentary box waffling on about Latvia for four quarters. The best I can do is rack up the votes and leave it to others to spend the rest of the week debating about how "I'm not against women in football BUT..."

The first quarter was a farce. It looked as if Brett Burton was going to kick 17 at one point, and it was only the work of Jared Rivers (pre-season Marcus Seecamp Medal specialist) that kept us in it. Cameron Bruce murdered it all over the ground throughout the day and was ably assisted by Brock McLean. And most importantly our "I thought you were dead" captain returned and ran riot just as it looked as if he'd completely lost it. We played well but there was no spark until the last quarter. Daniher is lucky that the goal umpiring farce will take the focus off him for a week. We still appeared to lack any gameplan, and yet again Brad "Future captain my arse" Miller found himself wandering around the backline doing his impression of a Czech soccer player.

The balls shown in the last quarter to take it to a Premiership contender was heartening but our season is still dead. The first draw since Wayne Lamb cocked up against the Swans in 1991 wasn't going to save us from a bottom four finish. Roll on next week and the final denouement on the 2006 season five months before it's over.

Votes

5 - Cameron Bruce
4 - Jared Rivers
3 - David Neitz
2 - Brock McLean
1 - Byron Pickett

Apologies to Davey, Johnstone, Green (!) and Yze (!!). Bartram was alright as well.

Leaderboard - 2006 Allen Jakovich Medal
You know, if votes in winning games counted double this would look exactly the same as it does now.

11 - Cameron Bruce
7 - Colin Sylvia
5 - Aaron Davey
4 - Nathan Carroll
4 - Jared Rivers
- Current leaders of the 2006 Marcus Seecamp Cup for best defensive player.
3 - Travis Johnstone
3 - David Neitz
3 - Byron Pickett
2 - Brent Moloney
2 - Brock McLean
1 - Daniel Ward

I'm increasing impressed with Pickett. He's obviously on the big downward slide from his peak but he's still throwing himself in like a madman.

Next week: Sydney - currently the worst Premiership defence since, err, last year - at the SCG. For reasons completely unknown to anyone I'll be there despite claiming I'd never go interstate for football again. A full report on the match and the laughably amateur status of their fans ("it's a line out!") to follow. Unless we get tonked and I neck up instead.

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